The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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