How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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