guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
