But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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