I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
