I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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