i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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