So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
420 ftw
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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