I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize