I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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