I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I just gift wrapped bread.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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