Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
you mean i was at the winter classic?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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