i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Randomize
