Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
I love black thongs
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Randomize
Follow @tfln