so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
