do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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