Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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