actually, I'm a sock model
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
