Cold hands, warm shart.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
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She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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