Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Sponge bath it is.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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