update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I fill condoms, not promises.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize