the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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