hell yes lets make some ravioli
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
