So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize