But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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