did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
