Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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