There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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