That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
