In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize