The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
