I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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