Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
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better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
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Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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