why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?