I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life