Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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