He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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