Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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