awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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