He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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