does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.