so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
