I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
