i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
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I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
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I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
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