You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
