if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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