then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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