Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
