there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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