week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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