Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize