Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize